My interview with Connie Ruben

LCR: If you could travel back in time, where would you go? Who would you see?

CR: This is a funny question as people who know me have heard me say so many times that I would like to go back in time to meet Elvis Presley. I tell myself, and others of course, that I would make him appreciate his life and he would clean up his act and he would still be with us today.. In this scenario of course, he falls in love with me and we live happily ever after….

LCR: What is the funniest (or strangest, or scariest) incident that has ever happened to you?

CR: Years ago, Peter, Grace and I were out at the coast for a vacation. Peter wanted to swim across the channel to the little island nearby and asked me if I would stay close to him in the dingy in case a boat came by. Grace watched from shore as he swam and I guarded him from the dingy. The only problem was that I had never driven the dingy before and was not so good with the controls and the ability to steer it in the direction I needed it to go. 

As Peter seemed to be doing alright, I decided to go off to one side and just practice the steering. I looked over and saw that he was getting close to shore so knew I needed to get the dingy back to his location. As I came close to him, I realized I had slowed down so much I did not have control of steering it left or right, thus, I was going to go right over top of him. I started yelling but he could not hear me. I was terrified I was going to run him over and the motor would kill him. I took one of the oars and began frantically hitting the water around the dingy in attempt to get his attention. 

Finally it worked and Peter turned around in the water just as the oar was coming down on his head. He thought I had lost my mind and when he was able to get next to the dingy and saw that I was crying hysterically, he softened enough to ask me what was going on. I, through my tears and sobs, told him I was afraid I was going to run him over and kill him.. He started laughing when he realized that the only other alternative I could come up with was hitting him over the head with the oar.

LCR: On my goodness, this incident had me laughing so hard! Thank you for sharing a part of your life with me and my readers. 



Connie Ruben is an entrepreneur with well developed management skills. She has run several large companies, and prides herself on empowering others to work to their full potential. Connie also has an intimate knowledge of the challenges and joys of caring for a family member with Alzheimer’s disease, as her mother-in-law Grace was diagnosed with advanced Alzheimer’s disease in 2003. While Connie still struggles to balance her work life and home life, her understanding of this disease has made it easier for her to negotiate the demands of being a caregiver, as well as a wife, mother, and employer. She has written this book in order to share the insights she has gained as Grace’s primary caregiver and friend. Most importantly, Connie wants this book to assure others that caring for someone with Alzheimer’s disease can be enjoyable, life-affirming, and emotionally significant.

Two years ago I was working in a community center as a Special care Counsellor, creating programs and activities for a Day Program for seniors with Alzheimer's disease. I did that for 4 years and loved my interaction with these seniors who taught me so much about compassion and humour. When I came across The Stages of Grace, I just knew I wanted to read it. The book cover with that beautiful pic of the author with her mother-in-law told me this was going to be a special book and I was right!

Even though Alzheimer's is one of the most difficult diseases both for the patient and the immediate family, and the author is honest and forthright about all the different emotions, fears and mistakes she made as she struggled to understand and deal with this disease, the book is beautiful and inspiring. It is a memoir about how Connie Ruben became the caregiver to her close friend and mother-in-law Grace. Through flashbacks, reflections and anecdotes of events and incidents, Connie brings to life her heartwarming friendship with a woman who she immediately loved from the moment she met her. Grace would become the mother Connie needed.

Reading this book was easy and enjoyable because it flowed well and I quickly became invested in Connie's recounting of her story. As someone familiar with the behaviours and symptoms associated with Alzheimer's I can attest that this book will be comforting for someone dealing with a parent or friend who has this illness. Connie, through examples of what she experienced with Grace, brings out with creative narrative how she dealt with the very difficult moments and situations and the lessons she learned.

I found so many gems of wisdom in this book. With intelligence and grace, Connie reflects on hindsight, insight, adaptability, negotiation, fallibility, acceptance and finally learning to live in the moment. It was truly a satisfying read.

In essence, this memoir is a tribute to Connie's love for her friend Grace. It is a touching account, heartbreaking at moments, delightful, sad, funny and faith-strengthening in the power of love. I think every person with ageing parents should read this book. Highly recommended!

Disclosure: Thanks to the author for sending me this book for review. I was not told how to rate or review this product.

To read more reviews, please visit Connie Ruben's page on iRead Book Tours.





Connie Ruben is an entrepreneur with well developed management skills. She has run several large companies, and prides herself on empowering others to work to their full potential. Connie also has an intimate knowledge of the challenges and joys of caring for a family member with Alzheimer’s disease, as her mother-in-law Grace was diagnosed with advanced Alzheimer’s disease in 2003. While Connie still struggles to balance her work life and home life, her understanding of this disease has made it easier for her to negotiate the demands of being a caregiver, as well as a wife, mother, and employer. She has written this book in order to share the insights she has gained as Grace’s primary caregiver and friend. Most importantly, Connie wants this book to assure others that caring for someone with Alzheimer’s disease can be enjoyable, life-affirming, and emotionally significant.

Connect with the author: Website